Tales from Jean

So today marked the last day of my work. I'm glad I don't have to be waking up at 6:15 every morning anymore =D. To celebrate I bring you 3 stories of events which have happened this past week for your enjoyment/amusement.


#1: The Slaying of Mr. Mosquito
So the other day I was off in my backyard picking cherry tomatoes to eat, unaware of a mosquito following me inside. I felt a tickle near my knee and scratched it while looking down and there was the culprit. Here's what went down:

Me to mosquito: OH YOU LITTLE... *SWAT-miss* OH BITCH IT'S ON..
I missed and spent the next 30 seconds swearing and swatting at it, hitting my cupboards and clapping my hands together like I'm giving a standing ovation. Finally I managed to swipe at it enough to daze it and i squished it with a paper napkin I had handy.
Me to dead mosquito: AH HA! THAT'S RIGHT BIOTCH GOTCHA NOW.

Unbeknownst to me, my situation was right in view of my mama who thought I'd gone crazy. If that wasn't enough, the dead mosquito had the last laugh when 15 minutes later I was itching at 2 newly formed bumps on my knee. BASTARD. fin.


#2: Smooth but Hard Road
I love rollerblading as exercise. I love that all the streets surrounding my house have been newly paved with smooth asphalt. (Rollerblading + smooth asphalt = Fast Times.) What I don't like is falling on my face, which is what I did in front of Alex's house. Here's a breakdown:

*trips on pebble*
*tries to regain balance*
*wobbles*
*trips on pot hole*
'ah shit, I give up'
*fall*

yup so now I have surface scrapes on one side of my body on my elbow and near my knee (incidentally it's the same knee the damn mosquito would bite a day later). I'm going to look like a wounded solider out on the dance floor. Le Fin.


#3: Buzzed.
Being at home has it's perks. I've got food and laundry done for me courtesy of me mum. Usually, laundry at my house is hung dried outside, then my pile is placed on my bed where it is subsequently left there and pushed to the side of my bed for weeks until I feel like putting it away in my closet. On one fine day, I decided to put my heap back in my closet right away like a good girl I am. All of a sudden vibrations and buzzing came from my sock so I poked it a couple more times to confirm my suspicions. After figuring out that there was probably a bee in my sock I took the whole pile of clothes, walked swiftly out of my room and down my stairs all the while saying/screaming open the door... OPEN THE DOOR.. OPEN THE FRIGGIN DOOR (referring to my front door). I set the insect free and my dad comes down from his room asking about the yelling. I told him my situation and his reply was: JEEZ JEAN, you're in nursing, you look at people being cut up, blood and dead things but you act like that bee was a bomb *shakes his head and goes back upstairs*. The End



Well those were my stories. I'm not doing a Jean's Pick today because this entry is quite long already. =D Oh well hope I didn't bore you.